The Saucy Cherry Show: Fuck Christmas and Fuck Hanukkah Too

Oh, I feel awful. It’s been so long, so very long, since I have posted anything. Or done anything of any significance. I’ve been too busy, far too busy, having a really amazing good time.

But no more! I am up to my neck in papers to grade and taking a little break to fill people in on what is going on.

Will I ever do my show again? I hope so. I am really considering doing a one off performance in February, or maybe a few at the Dark Room.

When is my book coming out?

Aw Jesus I don’t know but I do know that the fantabulous Chris Taylor has agreed to be my literary Daddy and in the new year I will be buckling down and really doing what he says.

And what about that radio show?

What, you don’t know about the radio show?

It’s on Radio Valencia and so far it’s been on a bit…sporadically. OK, there have been two shows. I thought they were available as podcasts but apparently not. I’ll look into that. The last one was with the inimitable Chicken John and he told some great stories.

Our next one will be 6:00 pm, Dec 20th, on Radio Valencia, and we have a great line up. Telling “Fuck Christmas” stories will be…Dixie De La Tour! Larry Edlestein! the Cherry Terror (me)! and the amazing, delectable saucy! And one other mystery teller not yet announced.

I do really hate Christmas. I don’t know when it started. Probably it all went to shit after my father told me I ruined Christmas (1983 and ‘84). Ever since then I have just had the worst reaction to canned, enforced cheer. It all comes down to the fact that I DON’T LIKE BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO!

Actually, that is dead wrong. There are circumstances where I LOVE being told what to do. But Christmas is not my Daddy. Let’s try this again: I HATE BEING TOLD HOW TO FEEL! So I silently growl and think “Fuck you!” every single time someone says “Merry Christmas!”

And yet I do it. I valiantly struggle to get presents, to make holiday meals, to get a tree. Why not ignore it if I hate it so much? Because I also don’t like feeling left out, that’s why. If everyone is getting trees and presents and turkey and eggnog, then fandammit, I am too. And if everyone is going to wear red, well, I have a lot of red. And that’s the way it is.